It’s 4am, and I’m starting over again.

Maybe I shouldn’t say “starting over” since I’m not really starting from scratch this time. Even so, I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve tried to start something meaningful, only to drop a project halfway through or give up before really trying. There was no in-between for me at the time, but thanks to improving my mental health and cultivating a steady support group, things have finally changed, and I feel true hope and happiness for the first time in my life :)

Life has had a funny yet not-so-funny way of making me learn things the hard way, and because of this, I’ve made a lot of mistakes out of fear. Fear of emotional pain, drastic change and possible failure kept me frozen in a state of unfulfillment. However, my dad and other loved ones have told me time and time again that failing is just an opportunity to learn. I can confidently say that I’ve learned A LOT, mainly about the Me who I thought disappeared in a sea of depression and PTSD a long time ago, and the kind of life I’m building now to honor that Me and become more myself. I hope that makes sense XD

I’ve always felt that I knew exactly who I was from a very young age, so I’m glad that I made it to a point in life where I can fully express myself and be the silly and sassy creative genius I OBVIOUSLY am! Jk (not really), but seriously, my mind is overflowing with ideas again and I’m ready to use all this extra energy I have now to MAKE EVERYTHING. I’m so back ;)